


HE'S NOT EVEN ASIAN!!!

by mrae6969lolz



Category: Castiel - Fandom, Dean Winchester - Fandom, Supernatural, destiel - Fandom
Genre: Funny, Humour, M/M, Smut, Supernatural - Freeform, i tried so love it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-07
Updated: 2015-07-07
Packaged: 2018-04-08 04:52:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4291443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mrae6969lolz/pseuds/mrae6969lolz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean Winchester finally gets a day alone in the bunker, but the question is will he end the day alone in the bunker? One could say a certian demon and prodding little brother could be the cause of a slight altercation in his plans and a steamy afternoon with a certian blue-eyed someone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	HE'S NOT EVEN ASIAN!!!

The day started as usual, after breaking a new personal record of a good 11 hours of sleep, Dean Winchester woke up, got dressed, and ate breakfast.  
His eggs were superb, of course that could have something to do with Dean's awesome cooking ability which definitely doesn't draw the line at fixing the most bad-ass bacon cheeseburgers to ever bad-ass but also includes other wide assortments of, pace yourself, Chef fucking Ramsay Gordon- worthy food.  
Breakfast would have been awesome but there was a factor keeping it from being just that. Like the tinsy bit about his gigantor of a brother not being anywhere in sight.  
No, there was no one scrounging about in the carefully laid out meal that he had specifically made for himself and Sam. So that left a question to be pondered over. Where the hell was Sammy? Usually the kid had the nose of a blood hound when it came to food, he'd be there to 'investigate' the source of the smell before you could finish putting the food in a plate.  
"Sam?!" Dean calls down the hall from the kitchen's doorway, but all it accomplishes is a strange echo of a distorted 'Sam' that bounces off the walls of the bunker.  
Quickly picking up his plate and setting it in the empty sink, because come on he isn't a slacker, he heads towards the kitchens' door in pursuit of Sammy's room.  
That's when he sees it. A note. One he would have seen if he would have stuck to his usual routine of pouring himself a hot cup of coffee. 

____________________________  
Dean, don't worry I'm out on a food run. Also I'm going to see that new film that advertised on tv last night, before you think a sarcastic remark about it, yes I remember your opinion of how "musicals are over the top and frankly the worst thing ever." Kind of like your taste in horribly greasy food.

-Your healthy green leaf eating brother, Sam.  
___________________________

Dean rolls his eyes. Whatever, Sam was going to regret that crappily advertised glee-reject anyways. Hey, at least this meant he had the bunker for himself for a while, he can finally get started with his spring cleaning.  
Heading towards the supply closet, he begins to select his items: a mop, bleach, brooms, a duster, some rags. All good for cleaning, however, where was the mean green? Windex? The fucking scrub brushes?!? Furniture polish?!?!?This was an out rage!  
"Damn it." Dean mutters under his breath. Guess it was time to make a quick stop to the store. Grabbing his leather jacket and keys he heads towards the garage as fast as his bowlegs could take him and makes his way into his beloved Baby, slams the door and listens as his car growls to life.  
Gas n' sip should have some cleaning supplies perhaps even the latest copy of Busty Asian Beauties.  
15 miles later Dean arrives at the Gas n' sip. Looking at the front looked very similar to the one Cas used to be employed in, it was very strange thinking of Cas being in such a mundane situation, laughable actually.  
However, he did have to admit one thing, seeing Cas in them form fitting blue jeans was quite a change to the usual' tax accountant' look he had. It was refreshing to see the change in apparel it looked good on the man. Very good, in fact a little too good- but before Dean could finish the thought on how that ass looked in thoes jeans the car door next to him slams breaking his train of thought.  
Probably for the best anyways considering he was beginning to tread through dangerous waters, one musent start thinking it could spark terrible ideas.  
It takes him a good three minutes to find and grab all he needs, and on his way to the counter he picks up an issue of a new porno mag. Then,for some stupid fucking reason when he looks for the pie it said they were out of it. Not even the Mrs. Bairds brand was there. Fuckers.  
Suspiciously it took a lot less time to make it home to the bunker, it could have been his copious amount of speeding but ya know what no cops in the area so thoes speed limit signs can go law somewhere else.  
As he puts the bag on the kitchen table he grabs the cleaning supplies inside and begins putting them on the table. He submerges his hand in the bag once more, fingers brush against the glossy cover of the scandalous magazine at the bottom. A warm heavy feeling starts to coil in the pit of his stomach.  
Well, it wouldn't hurt anything to take care of a little business before cleaning right? At east that's what Dean thinks as a pang of desire shoots through him for the brunette on the front cover of the porno mag. Big blue eyes stared straight up at him, he was sold.  
Picking up the magazine he wanders down the hall towards his room and shuts the door. A little privacy in an empty home is still nice, especially if prying younger brothers decide to come home unexpectedly early.  
He sits on the bed trying to get comfy, first removing his way too hot leather jacket, green flannel, then his tight black t-shirt .  
With his jeans and boots left he quickly shuffles out of his shoes and picks up the magazine beside him. His tongue darts out to wet his drying lips as he runs his fingers over the smooth glossy surface before opening up the magazine.  
It's like any other magazine you see, pictures upon pictures of women dressed in skimpy lingerie, at times more often than not, you see them with nothing on at all doing all sorts of things that would make a man's mouth water.  
In the case Dean was staring at now, you'd see a singular nude image of the brunette from the front cover, her eyes wide like a deer caught in the headlights of an on coming vehicle, hands settling on her hip and below her left breast. Dean feels the discomfort in his pants as his dick presses hard up against his zipper.  
With steady hands he unzips his jeans and pulls them down to his ankles kicking them off to the ground and then with one last lingering look he flips to the next page.  
And you wouldn't believe what he saw next, of course what's in his boxers took interest but his eyes widen in shock.  
"What the...fuck?" First he closes the book, no way in hell that he is actually seeing this. But sure enough as he re-opens the book the picture remains the same. Even as he brings the image up close to his face he could see it. It's really there.  
There he was, tan skin that went from head to toe of a man that lay on a silky red blanket hand wrapped around the same place Dean' s was hovering at the moment. He wore a look of ecstasy, his familiar blue eyes squeezed shut, full lips open wide as blush dusted across his angular cheeks, and his dark brown hair messily sat upon his head.  
It was Cas.  
No fucking way. There had to be an explanation. Did Jimmy used to be a pornography model? He doubted it, plus it was a recent issue from 2015. However this man looked too much like Cas for it not to be him.  
Flipping to another page, he looks to see yet another image of Cas, and then another, again and again, pose after pose of naked Cas' doing things Dean didn't think possible of an Angel to do. God, the things he could do to him in thoes photos.  
Closing the magazine he shakes his head, he can't do this, he will not jack off to the sexy pictures of Cas, no way in hell. Besides the only real satisfaction he would get from it would be the full experience, not just a quick hand job from himself. Kind of ruins the mood if you pin over something you couldn't have in real life.  
Groaning in frustration he throws the magazine aside ignoring the longing feeling for the magazine that was suspiciously filled with naked images of Cas and throws open his laptop to browse the quickest link to a porn site to get rid of his painfully hard boner.  
The first link to pop up as Busty Lusty Women and since Dean is in no picky mood he just clicks on it and with a sigh of relief sees the video start up with a pretty platinum blonde who is putting her long fingers to good use.  
Dragging his hand down his sensitive belly to the edge of his boxers he starts breathing heavier, his hand slides over the thin materials surface fondling himself putting a pleasing pressure on his cock sending his head reeling of mind blowing satisfaction. That's about the time when he notices something odd.  
The sound of the woman's moans begin to grow deeper. Dean begins to look at the screen dumbfounded, and incredibly her long blonde hair begins to grow darker and shorter. Following that her dark eyes lighten to a beautiful blue color, and then came the facial scruff.  
Now no longer female Dean stares at the screen, sure enough there he sits. Again. And with each pull of the wrist, Cas moans one of the filthiest moans Dean's ever heard pass from his parted lips. He is very vocal on screen, as his hand moving at a fast pace.  
Dean growls in frustration as he slams his laptop shut abruptly pausing the sensual sound of Cas' moans. What the fuck was going on?!? Can't a man beat his fucking meat without his best friend popping up during happy time??? Better question why the hell was Cas haunting his porn? Who ever was doing this had a really fucked up sense of humour.  
Working himself up to an odd mix of angry and horny a thought suddenly occurred to him. What if he simply just picks up an old copy of Busty Asian Beauties? There were no pictures or images of Cas in thoes.  
Desperately Dean grabs on of his good ol' copies of his favorite porno mag and opens it to one of his most frequently used pages, which is his favorite obviously because of this cute little Asian chick with the tongue piercing.  
The page was all good though except for one dilemma, the positioning of the body, legs spread wide and hands sliding down the chest, all the same as before. However there was one significant change that had taken place.  
"OH COME ON!" Dean shouts.  
" CAS ISN'T EVEN ASIAN FOR FUCKS SAKE!!!" He yells as he throws the magazine with full force across the room. Honestly, this whole situation is beginning to be bullshit, who the fuck is taking their sweet time just to fuck up his day?!?  
Well jokes on thoes fuckers, he doesn't need dirty pictures to get what he wants. That's right he's going solo, nothing his right hand and an awesome imagination can't fix.  
Roughly he shoves his hand down his boxers and groans as his fingers finally make contact with his cock. Waves of pleasure run on the flesh beneath his fingers with each stroke, he was so close.  
And then he hears it. The moaning from the laptop earlier, the sexy moans that spilt from Cas lips earlier begin to sound from the speakers.  
No no no no. He will not get off to the sound of Cas' moans, this had to end.  
Pushing himself off his bed he runs to his bedroom door, no sound could possibly reach the bathroom down the hall, and as he opens it he runs straight into something. Or should he say someone, mouth agape and eyes wide like he had been found with his hands in the cookie jar Dean looks straight into the eyes of the man he had been seeing for the past fifteen minutes.  
"Dean? Are you okay?! I heard you shout and I- " and that's about the time Cas looks down. Dean tries to swallow the lump in his throat completely embarrassed to have been caught with his pants down-ish.  
"Uh, I- ah, " Cas blushes trying but unsuccessfully to look away from Dean's tented boxers and avoid eye contact, but unfortunately instead having a strange combination of his blue eyes darting from the floor to Dean's green eyes to his boxers and back again.  
Right about now Dean wishes he could just fly off the planet because fuck these awkward situations.  
"I''ll just-" Cas tries to say but then the moaning sound from Dean's laptop begin again cutting off his dialogue and that catches his attention.  
"I can explain!!!" Dean quickly says but then he realizes something. He actually can't. And what makes it so much worse is that his laptop is no longer closed, somehow it's screen just happened to be open and faced towards the door.  
"Dean, what is that?" Cas asks, eyes wide in realization of who it looked like on the screen. With no possible way of explaining his situation Dean does what he always does. Really fucks up his situation.  
Instead of handling the situation like a normal person and thinking a little more with his upstairs brain than his downstairs one, Dean grabs the collar of Cas' trenchcoat and crushes his lips to Cas'. But only for a brief moment. By then he had realized what he just did, his eyes widened and his mouth parted ready for an apology.  
And don't get him wrong, he really was about to apologise for capturing thoes luscious chapped lips but thoes same lips happened to have glued themselves back to his at the moment.  
Suprised at the very eager return of the kiss Dean lets Cas take charge and slam him into the wall behind them, his long fingers managing to capture Dean's cheeks (no not his ass cheeks although I'm sure it would be at the top of the list for Cas ;-)) to pull his face closer.  
What really got Dean going was when Cas' leg found its way between his legs and brushed up against his dick causing a very nice moan of the word 'fuck' to vibrate against the angels lips. God he was going to be the death of him.  
By the moan Cas pretty much figured it out and instead of having both hands on Dean's face he took one of them and had it snake it's way down and slip into Dean's boxers. His lips also began to wander latching themselves to corner of Dean's neck where his pulse was causing him to gasp form the sensitivity of the area.  
However, as much as Dean would love for Cas to fuck him into the wall right now, and he really would because Damn that man knew what he was doing with that hand and his lips, a bed seemed like a better option.  
So with that decision decided Dean pushes Cas back a little grabbing his wrists and stirs him in the direction of his memory foam bed. Lets just say what's about to happen on this mattress will definitely be remembered.  
As they fall on the bed Dean lets go of Cas' wrists and begin to roam starting from Cas' shoulders then slowly down his sensitive sides stopping only slip his hands beneath the Angel's belt to un-tuck his button down shirt.  
Cas begins to work his way out of the trenchcoat as well and his dress suit jacket and throws them to the side somewhere on the floor then wraps his arms around Dean to pull them closer together.  
Dean's tongue snuck it's way into the angels mouth, Cas reflecting Dean's strokes between their lips. Dean starts to unbutton Cas' dress shirt one button at a time, his finger slightly brushing Cas' belly with each button driving the Angel mad enough to grab Dean's hands, forcing them above his head while wrapping his legs around Dean's hips to flip them over.  
Now atop of Dean's lap Cas is able to rip that pesky dress shirt off, grinding down on Dean's erection in the process causing the Hunter to groan as the buttons fly in all directions.  
"Impatient aren't we?" Dean laughs catching his breath from the sudden change in position.  
"Oh you have no idea..." Cas replies his blue eyes now practically black from his pupils dialating as they peered down at Dean who's green eyes were probably the same.  
Cas dives back down to Dean's lips nipping them with his teeth and releases Dean's trapped wrists while grinding down again as his hands drag down the hunters chest.  
"Oh God, Cas!" Dean gasps groping the thighs wrapped around either side of his hips, slightly he releases them sliding them up to the clasp on Cas' belt. He struggles with it for a moment before pulling it loose only to hear it clump to the floor a moment later.  
After a few more exchanging kisses Cas' fingers seemed to have found their way to the elastic on Dean's boxers snapping it against the skin before venturing lower to kneed the hardened flesh beneath the boxers driving Dean insane. Suddenly it stops and then with a slight shift Dean feels the cool air hit the sensitive area.  
The boxers have left the building.  
"Take them off, now." Dean growls like a mad man as he pops the button of Cas' slacks open then pulls down the zipper. Shifting his position, Cas quickly manages to pull off his slacks and boxers and reposition himself above Dean, one of his legs slipping in between the hunters.  
Finally it was skin on skin, and God it was perfect. Perfect because Cas was grinding between his legs their erections colliding with each thrust, causing waves of pleasure to shoot through Dean clouding his head of only Cas and what he was doing to him.  
Wrapping his arms around the Angel, Dean's calloused hands dig into Cas' shoulder blades, he was so close he was merely seconds away from coming undone right here underneath Cas' heavy thrusts.  
"C'Mon Cas," Dean breaths heavily his words intertwining with Cas' panting as he looks him dead in the eyes with an intense gaze," come for me."  
Mewling Cas' thrusts begin to become erratic, moving unevenly his sweat slick body shutters as his breathing picks up.  
"Dean!" Cas moans his nose burrowing into the corner of Dean's neck as his body tenses up.  
"C'Mon baby." And that's all it takes as well as a single thrust to send Cas over the edge, Dean could feel Cas' warm release hit his stomach and that's what sent him on his own high. He could feel it coil in his lower abdomen and it ran all the way to the tips of his toes, his heart racing at top speed and his breath stoped for a minute of pure orgasmic bliss.  
Coming down from his high Dean lay there catching his breath looking up at Cas who still lay atop of him pressing soft fluttery kisses every place he could on Dean.  
"Fuck Cas, why the hell did we not do this sooner? " Dean laughs, Cas joining him as he roll over to rest at his side, Dean's arm still wrapped around him.  
"Because we are idiots," Cas chuckles peering at Dean through his lashes.  
Dean smiles sweetly at the Angel not being able to help himself from leaning forward to capture thoes lips once more. What are the chances?  
Then a thought occurs to him. Something he forgotten due to the moment of pure awesomeness.  
"By the way ,Cas. What made you stop by the bunker?" Dean asks looking at the Angel suddenly very weary.  
"Sam called, he said You required my assistance," Cas replies confusion shown clearly on his flushed face.  
"Son of a bitch...."Dean says somewhat realizing what was going on. That little shit staged this. Not that he was complaining, I mean hey it got him one Hell of a sexy man to cherish for the rest of his life.

______________________________________________

* Somewhere @ a diner in Kansas*

"Thanks for your help."  
"It was a long time coming Moose, you and I both know it, besides I was also getting tiered of Squirrel moping over not getting action with his winged chew toy," replied the witty Scottish accented man.  
Silence fell between the tall thin man and the short boastful Demon.  
"So how long do you think it will take before Squirrel figures out who has been tweaking up all his toys?"  
"Hopefully never, but at least me calling Cas to show up at the bunker 'incidentally' worked out well. Even better maybe even after all this, the sexual tension between thoes two will finally simmer down so I don't have to mentally block out their long lingering gazes anymore," Sam sighs trying not to mentally gag on the thought of what was happening at the bunker right now.  
Hey at least they finally got down to business and admitted their thing for one another. Don't get Sam wrong he was ecstatic they are together now, however Sam did not wish to mentally have this thought of his brother and Cas in sexual situations. Not cool.  
"Fat chance," Crowley smirks at Sam, making him groan because the asshole was probably right. Just think of all the innuendos Dean was soon to make as well as the gooey eye sex that he was going to be a witness to in the nearby future.  
"Hey Moose, good luck getting a goods night sleep at the bunker now, yeah,"Crowley smirks evily and in the blink of an eye he dissapears.  
"Fuck off , " Sam remarks at the empty chair beside him, now that he realizes just what he meant.  
The bunker was about to get a lot more noisier at night. They weren't joking about what goes bump in the night being pretty horrifying, especially to younger brothers .

**Author's Note:**

> My friend Ariel inspired me to continue and write this, hopefully yall like!!


End file.
